Friday 2 May 2014

DUCK JOKE

A duck walks into  a pub and orders a pint of beer and  a ham sandwich.
The barman  looks at him and says,
 "Hang on! You're  a duck."

 "I see your eyes are working," replies the duck.
And you can talk!" Exclaims the barman
I see your ears are working, too," says the duck
"Now if you don't  mind, can I have my beer and my  sandwich please?"
"Certainly, sorry about that,"
Says the barman as he pulls the duck's pint."It's just we don'T
get many ducks  in this pub.. What  are you doing  round this way?"
"I'm working on the building site across the road,"
 Explains the duck."I'm a plasterer."
 The  flabbergasted  barman cannot  believe the duck and wants to learn more, but takes the hint when the duck  pulls out a  newspaper
 from  his bag and  proceeds to read  it.
 So, the duck  reads his paper, drinks his beer,  eats his sandwich,
bids  the barman good  day and leaves.
 The same thing  happens for two  weeks.
Then one day the  circus comes to  town.The ringmaster comes into the  pub for a pint and the barman says to him
 "You're with the circus, aren't  you? Well, I know this duck that could be just  brilliant in your circus. He talks, drinks beer, eats
 sandwiches, reads the  newspaper and  everything!"
"Sounds  marvellous, “says the ringmaster,  handing over his  business card.
 "Get him to give me a call."
 So the next day  when the duck  comes into the  pub the barman says,
 "Hey Mr. Duck, I  reckon I can line  you up with a top  job, paying really good money."
 "I'm always  looking for the next job," says the duck.
 "Where is it?"
At the circus,"Says the barman.
"The circus?"
Repeats the  duck.
 "That's right," Replies the barman.
"The circus?" The duck asks  again.
 "With the  big tent?"
"Yeah," the  barman replies.
 "With all the  animals who live  in cages, and  performers who live in caravans?"  says  the duck.
"Of course,"
the  barman replies.
"And the tent  has canvas sides and a big canvas roof with a hole in the middle?" persists the duck.
 "That's right!" says the barman.
 The duck shakes his head in amazement, and  says .. . ........

 "What the 
Blooby Hell would they want a plasterer for !!"